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Blonde jokes (CB if you ban me... =P)

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Rico978
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Post by Naruto62396 Thu May 08, 2008 7:05 pm

Joke 1.

A blonde goes to an electronic store. She grabs a TV. The cashier says "No blondes allowed"

She trys again the next day, but died her hair brown. "No blondes allowed"

Then the next day, she died her hair Brunnett. "No blondes allowed"

"Why cant I come here?"

"Well for one, that's a microwave not a TV!"

Joke 2

A lady goes to the store.
"Any alligator shoes?"
"Nope, we're bought out."
2 weeks later, the same worker was at the beach. He saw the lady that asked for the shoes. She has a shot gun and shot an alligator.
"What the hell did you do that for??"
"Damnit, this one doesnt have shoes either!"
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Post by Cursed Blonde Sun May 11, 2008 5:32 pm

Dumb blonde jokes are funny. I don't mind them. =]

omg wtf. Don't edit mah posts.
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Post by SirBillybob Sun Jun 22, 2008 5:43 am

i like the first one
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Post by Brenstar Sun Jun 22, 2008 6:03 am

i like both u know why cuz i like jokes there really funny
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Post by KTP123 Sun Jun 22, 2008 9:57 am

I am Blond But i still love the Joke
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Post by Artzach90 Mon Jul 07, 2008 3:40 pm

I love blonde jokes...dumb ones that is.
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Post by FindingFour Fri Jul 18, 2008 6:30 pm

lol,Those are pretty bad.
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Post by SirIziz Sat Jul 19, 2008 10:25 pm

how about this one

there were 3 girls brunnete,blonde,and red head
they went into the bathroom with a magic mirror he said "no questions"
brunnete said "ok"
Red Head said "alright"
Blonde was looking herself in the mirror and said "why do i have this zit"
they never so blonde again
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Post by Artzach90 Sun Jul 20, 2008 10:40 am

Hehe...I haz a good one.

Okay, so there are 2 blondes and one brunette.
The brunette goes hunting. She comes back with a bear. The blondes ask her hwo she got it.
"I found tracks, i followed them, and bam!" said the brunette.
Now, one of the blondes go hunting. She comes back with a raccoon. The other blonder asked her how she got it.
"I found tracks, i followed them, and bam!" said the blonde.
Then teh stupid blonde goes out to hunt. She comes abck with tire trackers all over her body, and a broken arm and leg. teh Brunette and other blonde asked her how she got that.
"i found some tracks, i followed the tracks, and BAM!" said the dumb blonde.


If you dont get this joke, or you want to knwo what it's about click spoiler please.


Spoiler:
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Post by tux2288 Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:56 pm

um ok im a blonde but i dont mind the jokes anyway i got one ok here it is

a guy is working in his backyard and he sees his neighbor who is a blonde and she comes out of the house open her mailbox and slams it shut and then 1 minute later she comes out, opens the mailbox, and slams it shut again and she does that 3 more times and then the guy asks why are u doing that and she says "everytime i turn on the computer it says" 'you've got mail!'
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Post by tux2288 Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:59 pm

heres another good one.

a blonde girl is riding a horse and she slips and the horse is going faster she slipping shes turning sideways the horse is going faster......she is still slipping uh oh shes upside down she knows if she falls of then she will die so she knows this is probably the last moments of her life. Her fingers are slipping she cant make it and................ the k-mart manager turns the electric horse off
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Post by tux2288 Tue Aug 12, 2008 10:28 pm

and heres another one

ok a brunnette a redhead and a blonde are trapped on a deserted island and the shore is a hundred miles off so they all try to swim to shore. the brunnette swims 50 miles and drowns the redhead swims 80 miles and drowns the blonde swims 50 miles gets tired and swims back

*the blonde swam the equal distance of the way to get to shore but she went back to the island instead*
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Post by XDamaged_SoulX Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:05 pm

lolz a blonde goes into a hair salon with her ipod and asks the stylist teh cut her hair. The stylist said to the blonde "i need to trim by your ears may i take your earphone out for a moment" the blonde agrees and the stylist continues his work when he's done he asks the girl if she needs anything else and the girl doesnt respond. He checks her pulse and she dead. He pick up her ipod to see what she wsa listening to and.....

"INHALE....EXHALE" xD
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Post by sstone181 Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:24 pm

that was a funny one lol
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Post by Seelkadoom Wed Aug 13, 2008 12:47 am

LOL very funny
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Post by tux2288 Wed Aug 13, 2008 8:55 am

ok heres a good one

there is a crowd of blondes at a stadium and an announcer picks a girl from the audience and says, "you have the chance to win 75 milion dollars if you answer this question right ok here it is what is..... 50+50?" the girl goes "um... 0? the announcer says "sorry you didnt win" and the crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance" and the guy says "ok i'll give her another chance.....what is 100+100?" the girl says"50!" the announcer says "sorry you didn't win. the crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance" the announcer says "alright but only one more channce.... what is ....2+2?" the girl says "ummmm........0..no..4 yes 4!" the announcer says "congradulations you've won 75million dollars!!!!" the crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance" Smile
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Post by SoccerGirl Wed Aug 13, 2008 7:35 pm

i dont get it..

(im blonde) lol
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Post by XDamaged_SoulX Wed Aug 13, 2008 8:17 pm

lolz dont worry i dont get it either
lolz but i do have the perfect avie for you xP its so cute
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Post by Rico978 Mon Apr 13, 2009 11:41 pm

Ok here is one I got in a e-mail, A blonde gets pulled over by another blonde cop the cop says "I am going to need to see some ID". The blonde says "what does it look like" and that cop says "it is square and it has your picture on it". The blonde hands the cop a mirror and the cop says " My mistake I didn't know you were a cop".
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Post by CutieGirl167 Tue Apr 14, 2009 4:39 am

Yeah! It's a good one. I laughed till' my head almost fell off.
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Post by Brenstar Thu May 14, 2009 8:14 am

i used to be a blonde now im a brownie hair =P
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Post by Jordan101011 Sat Jul 25, 2009 2:12 pm

I got a couple

A Blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and sure enough, she opens the door and finds him in the arms of a redhead.

Well, the blonde is angry, She opens her purse to take out the gun but as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells “No, honey, don’t do it.” The blond replies “Shut up, you’re next.”
-----
There were two blondes, and they had just came from a store.

The blonde that owned the mustang had locked her keys in the car. She was trying to pick the lock when she stoped to rest for a second.

When she sat down, her friend said, “Hurry up, it’s starting to rain and the top’s down!”
-----
a blonde went up to someone and asked them
“what does I.D.K. mean?”

the person replied..
“i don’t know.”

and then the blonde got mad and shouted
“OH MY GOSH, NO ONE KNOWS!”
-----
A blone is trying to sell her car. But it has over 200,000 miles on it, so she takes it to her friend that can illegally set it back.

A few days later her friend checks to see if she sold he car. She said "No, it only has 50,000 miles on it."
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Post by Acdog Sat Jul 25, 2009 5:36 pm

I don't get the last one.. O.O But the IDK is really funny. lol.
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Post by Jordan101011 Sat Jul 25, 2009 8:12 pm

I'll tell you.
Her car originally had 200,000 miles on it.
Her friend illegally lowered so she could sell it easier.
She keeps it cuz it has only 50,000 miles cuz her friend changed it.
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Post by Acdog Sat Jul 25, 2009 10:36 pm

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh lol I get it. The blonde thinks that the car really only DOES have 50,000 miles,so she dosen't want to sell it. Razz
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